


I've drawn that conclusion by listening to the many dozens of husbands and wives I've counseled, almost all of whom have admitted that after 10 or 20 years of marriage, passion became elusive. Sharing lives is different from sharing dinners and long walks and weekends away. When you were dating the man you ultimately married, you were both acting much of the time (consciously or not), putting your best feet forward in order to be attractive to each other. When you were sick or had a bad headache, you probably pretended it was no big deal. So did he. Now when your stomach is upset, you feel free to tell him you're about to throw up.


